【分享】[转贴] 暴笑！《射雕》——高手过招之PK蚊子

润木

<p class="MsoNormal" style="BACKGROUND: white; MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 3.55pt; WORD-BREAK: break-all; LINE-HEIGHT: 150%; TEXT-ALIGN: left; mso-pagination: widow-orphan" align="left"> <span style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; COLOR: #003399; LINE-HEIGHT: 150%; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-bidi-font-family: 宋体; mso-font-kerning: 0pt"><span lang="EN-US"></span></span> <p class="MsoNormal" style="BACKGROUND: white; MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; WORD-BREAK: break-all; LINE-HEIGHT: 150%; TEXT-ALIGN: left; mso-pagination: widow-orphan; tab-stops: 27.0pt" align="left"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; COLOR: #333333; LINE-HEIGHT: 150%; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-bidi-font-family: 宋体; mso-font-kerning: 0pt"></span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; COLOR: #333333; LINE-HEIGHT: 150%; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-bidi-font-family: 宋体; mso-font-kerning: 0pt">最残忍的打法<span lang="EN-US">——</span>梅超风（俺最的爱哦）：抓住蚊子，把脑袋揪下来，再在上面按五个洞洞。<span lang="EN-US"></span></span><p class="MsoNormal" style="BACKGROUND: white; MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; WORD-BREAK: break-all; LINE-HEIGHT: 150%; TEXT-ALIGN: left; mso-pagination: widow-orphan; tab-stops: 27.0pt" align="left"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; COLOR: #333333; LINE-HEIGHT: 150%; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-bidi-font-family: 宋体; mso-font-kerning: 0pt"></span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; COLOR: #333333; LINE-HEIGHT: 150%; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-bidi-font-family: 宋体; mso-font-kerning: 0pt">最损失的打法<span lang="EN-US">——</span>拉灯：几记一阳指过后，蚊子倒是被烧焦咧，可可可是屋里的电视，床单，墙皮，地板无一幸免。<span lang="EN-US"></span></span><p class="MsoNormal" style="BACKGROUND: white; MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; WORD-BREAK: break-all; LINE-HEIGHT: 150%; TEXT-ALIGN: left; mso-pagination: widow-orphan; tab-stops: 27.0pt" align="left"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; COLOR: #333333; LINE-HEIGHT: 150%; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-bidi-font-family: 宋体; mso-font-kerning: 0pt"></span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; COLOR: #333333; LINE-HEIGHT: 150%; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-bidi-font-family: 宋体; mso-font-kerning: 0pt">最仿生的打法<span lang="EN-US">——</span>欧阳锋：四肢着地，鼓起腮帮，蚊子飞过，成蛤蟆状跃起，尔后张开嘴，蚊子横尸其中。<span lang="EN-US"></span></span><p class="MsoNormal" style="BACKGROUND: white; MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; WORD-BREAK: break-all; LINE-HEIGHT: 150%; TEXT-ALIGN: left; mso-pagination: widow-orphan; tab-stops: 27.0pt" align="left"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; COLOR: #333333; LINE-HEIGHT: 150%; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-bidi-font-family: 宋体; mso-font-kerning: 0pt"></span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; COLOR: #333333; LINE-HEIGHT: 150%; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-bidi-font-family: 宋体; mso-font-kerning: 0pt">最不可思议的打法<span lang="EN-US">——</span>周伯通：左手抓东边蚊子，右手抓西边蚊子，两只手还互相干扰，抓住以后，用绳子拴着<span lang="EN-US">-</span>放风筝。<span lang="EN-US"></span></span><p class="MsoNormal" style="BACKGROUND: white; MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; WORD-BREAK: break-all; LINE-HEIGHT: 150%; TEXT-ALIGN: left; mso-pagination: widow-orphan; tab-stops: 27.0pt" align="left"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; COLOR: #333333; LINE-HEIGHT: 150%; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-bidi-font-family: 宋体; mso-font-kerning: 0pt"></span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; COLOR: #333333; LINE-HEIGHT: 150%; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-bidi-font-family: 宋体; mso-font-kerning: 0pt">最高效的打法<span lang="EN-US">——</span>洪七公：亢龙有悔，潜龙在渊，神龙摆尾<span lang="EN-US">......</span>尘土飞扬落定后，手上沾了十八只蚊子。<span lang="EN-US"></span></span><p class="MsoNormal" style="BACKGROUND: white; MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; WORD-BREAK: break-all; LINE-HEIGHT: 150%; TEXT-ALIGN: left; mso-pagination: widow-orphan; tab-stops: 27.0pt" align="left"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; COLOR: #333333; LINE-HEIGHT: 150%; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-bidi-font-family: 宋体; mso-font-kerning: 0pt"></span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; COLOR: #333333; LINE-HEIGHT: 150%; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-bidi-font-family: 宋体; mso-font-kerning: 0pt">最变态的打法<span lang="EN-US">——</span>黄药师：抓住蚊子后，不是揪掉翅膀，就是掖掉腿，然后扔出窗去也。<span lang="EN-US"></span></span><p class="MsoNormal" style="BACKGROUND: white; MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; WORD-BREAK: break-all; LINE-HEIGHT: 150%; TEXT-ALIGN: left; mso-pagination: widow-orphan; tab-stops: 27.0pt" align="left"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; COLOR: #333333; LINE-HEIGHT: 150%; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-bidi-font-family: 宋体; mso-font-kerning: 0pt"></span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; COLOR: #333333; LINE-HEIGHT: 150%; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-bidi-font-family: 宋体; mso-font-kerning: 0pt">最精湛的打法<span lang="EN-US">——</span>哲别<span lang="EN-US">VS</span>郭敬：轰上天后，用箭射之。<span lang="EN-US"></span></span><p class="MsoNormal" style="BACKGROUND: white; MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; WORD-BREAK: break-all; LINE-HEIGHT: 150%; TEXT-ALIGN: left; mso-pagination: widow-orphan; tab-stops: 27.0pt" align="left"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; COLOR: #333333; LINE-HEIGHT: 150%; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-bidi-font-family: 宋体; mso-font-kerning: 0pt"></span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; COLOR: #333333; LINE-HEIGHT: 150%; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-bidi-font-family: 宋体; mso-font-kerning: 0pt">最辛苦的打法<span lang="EN-US">——</span>全真七子：摆北斗阵，每人手里一把拂尘，随着蚊子的飞行变化阵型，直至蚊子累死。<span lang="EN-US"></span></span><p class="MsoNormal" style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; TEXT-INDENT: 25pt; tab-stops: 27.0pt; mso-char-indent-count: 2.5"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; COLOR: #333333; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;">最无耻的打法</span><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; COLOR: #333333"><font face="Times New Roman">——</span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; COLOR: #333333; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;">完颜洪烈：绑架母蚊子和小蚊子，然后吸引公蚊子，将其杀之。</span><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; COLOR: #333333"></span><p class="MsoNormal" style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; TEXT-INDENT: 25pt; tab-stops: 27.0pt; mso-char-indent-count: 2.5"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; COLOR: #333333"><font face="Times New Roman"></span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; COLOR: #333333; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;">最下流的打法</span><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; COLOR: #333333"><font face="Times New Roman">——</span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; COLOR: #333333; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;">东方不败：用绣花针刺蚊子。</span><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; COLOR: #333333"><font face="Times New Roman"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span></span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; COLOR: #333333; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;">最浪费的打法</span><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; COLOR: #333333"><font face="Times New Roman">——</span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; COLOR: #333333; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;">黄蓉：做一桌好饭好菜，把蚊子撑死。</span><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; COLOR: #333333"><font face="Times New Roman"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span></span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; COLOR: #333333; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;">最锻炼身体的打法</span><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; COLOR: #333333"><font face="Times New Roman">——</span><span style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; COLOR: #333333; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;; mso-hansi-font-family: &quot;Times New Roman&quot;">裘千仞：带着蚊子爬上铁掌山，然后从山顶扔下来，让它缺氧窒息而死。</span><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; COLOR: #3333