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【转帖】儿童社交能力的培养

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1#
发表于 2005-7-11 13:43:50 | 只看该作者 回帖奖励 |倒序浏览 |阅读模式
儿童社交能力的培养

作者:Sonya Versluys

如何鼓励和培养孩子的社交能力呢是很多家长关心的问题?在当今世界,社交能力往往影响到孩子今后的成功发展。父母应该关注孩子社交活动的能力水平,孩子与其他孩子,大一些或小一些的孩子接触时相互融洽的程度。

你的孩子在其他孩子面前会有怯弱的表现吗?你的孩子害怕在众人面前说话吗?这些是在最早期判断孩子是否存在社交障碍的问题。你能从孩子幼儿时的表现来判断孩子的行为倾向,并且采取适当的方法使孩子走向社交的舞台。

现在的孩子将面临比上几代人更大的挑战。随着计算机时代的到来,出现了“网络社交技巧”。掌握熟练的社交技巧的难度也加大了。不能只是象过去一样简单地让孩子们参加一些适当的社交活动了。

那么,你该怎么做呢?有一系列的提高孩子社交能力的方法,下面是其中的一些方法:

1、参加一个活动小组

看看地方的报纸,找找有没有适应你孩子年龄的活动小组。现在一般有各种各样孩子能够参加的活动小组。当然,这些辅导班和小组顺带还可以提高你孩子智力,但是需要选择一个最需要人相互接触的活动小组了。计算机班或者艺术班是不错的,但更要让孩子参加体育活动班或其他集体性项目的活动班。

2、从小抓起

记住:社交能力的培养越早越好。带着你的孩子参加“妈妈-宝贝”活动,在那有很多同样年龄的孩子一起活动

3、让孩子们自己解决问题

太多的家长总想插手解决孩子之间的问题。记住:孩子们需要机会学习如何解决他们自己的问题。在大多数情况下,孩子们的一些纠纷往往他们能够自己解决。当然,你应该始终有个意识关注事情的发展。尽可能多的给孩子机会,让孩子们自己把问题想清楚,让孩子们自己处理相互之间的关系。这对婴儿同样适用,不仅仅只对大一点的孩子。当孩子们为了一件玩具发生争执的时候,你可以在一旁观察,只有当事情看上去无法控制时,你再插手,。不然,你只需要看看他们是否能够把问题解决好。

4、让孩子向你寻求帮助

从孩子很小的时候,你应该鼓励和培养孩子寻求帮助的能力。假如他们不能解决问题和纠纷的时候,不要急于插手。首先,给孩子们一个机会自己把问题解决,如果孩子们解决不了,再给他们一个向你寻求帮助的机会。假如你有意识地这样做了,孩子们承受挫折的能力将得到提高。然后,你可以采取各种方式帮助他们解决问题,但在作之前不要忘了问一句,“你们需要我的帮助吗?”。简单的一句话,可以让孩子懂得,在他们自己无法解决问题的时候,寻求帮助是非常对的。当他们步入成人的世界时,也许他们就不再为寻求他人的帮助而感到怯懦和羞涩了。

5、降低羞涩感

通常的办法,是当着孩子的面,善意地羞愧一个成年人。但这种方法,孩子们并不都能接受。每个孩子都不一样,所以,他们感知的方式也不尽相同。你需要按照孩子对这类嘲讽的承受能力来进行演示。在孩子的世界中,每件事对孩子们来说都是非常重要的。仔细考虑孩子每天的课内、课外的事情,就象考虑你的工作中的事情一样。严肃对待他们,让孩子们为每一次、每一个“成就”感到自豪。保证孩子的每一天都能够得到有像你一样多的交流和分析。

6、更多的谈话

想知道在路途中干些什么吗?那好,这就是与孩子对话的绝好机会。不要以为路上开着车,把收音机打开就行了。关了它!问一些问题。即使孩子没有任何反应也没关系,关键是你正在努力并给孩子暗示。可以让孩子知道,你很看重这种交流,孩子们也慢慢能够接受这种交流。

7、问大量的问题

千万不要以为孩子似乎没有什么问题可以问,好像找不出什么值得问的问题。这可能是因为孩子在与他人分享信息或话题时感到害羞或胆怯。假如你始终强调孩子们对这个世界的贡献多么重要,他们就会开始信任这个世界,并提出和回答问题。
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2#
发表于 2005-7-12 21:39:12 | 只看该作者
很好的建议,谢谢!但对于一个已经是五岁的内向男孩,具体还要怎么做呢?
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3#
 楼主| 发表于 2005-7-17 05:03:34 | 只看该作者
Hi, 雨层云, can I type in English? Sorry for the inconvinience1. It's okay to be quiet, and it's okay to be shyLet your child develop his own sense of what's comfortable. Don't make a big deal about it at a young age.2. Talk to the teacherParent-teacher communication is an important tool for helping shy kids, especiallyin school.1) Start by comparing notes on how your child acts at school and at home. - What activities does your child love at home that aren't part of the classroom? - What does your child dislike that he or she is expected to do at school? 2) Meet with the teacher and work out a plan- Gather information with your child's teachers- Look for ways to help make the classroom an engaging and comfortable place3. Bring his interests to schoolFor example, if your child is fascinated by bugs but bugs haven't been talked about much at school, let him bring his collection to the classroom. Make sure the teacher doesn't force your child to make a formal presentation, but ask her to set up an opportunity for your child to talk or answer questions. The teacher could hold a bug discussion using your child's materials as the visual aids, or create a bug station based on your child's supplies.Supporting child's interests DO makes a difference. This gives his/her a way to share himself/herself."4. Set him up for successIf you can visit your child's classroom, see whether the games, projects, and activities there are a good match for your child, providing stimulation and opportunities for success. If there are activities seem above your child's ability level, talk to the teacher about simplifying them, or make surethere areoptions. Make sure your child doesn't get frustrated5. Make sure he's challengedIt may be that activities at school are boring your child because they're too easy. If you suspect this is an issue, work with the teacher on ways to give your child more challenge. Maybe the teacher could borrow materials from a higher grade to have on hand for your child.6. Help him at homeSome children have an easier time grasping new skills in a quiet place, without the stimulation and pressures of the classroom. For example, if your child is awkward painting with a brush, do painting projects together at home. Find out what songs your child enjoys most from school, and sing them around the house or dining table.Give your child chances to practice, but try not to make it pressure. Young children master new skills at different paces, and there's no need to turn it into work. The idea is to build your child's confidence. The key is to make sure you don't push your child too much.7. Focus on his accomplishmentsDon't just pay attention to the stumbling blocks. Doing fun and easy school activities at home is a wonderful way to ease participation fears. Most classes have favorite group songs, bellowed around the classroom or at least at music or circle time. Find out which ones your child enjoys, and make them part of the evening routine. If your child gains confidence in singing at home, this can rub off in the classroom.8. Be his "student" Children role-play "school" (or "play-with-friends") at home with dolls and stuffed animals as a nonthreatening way to practice being outside. Set up a school(your friend's home, parks, etc.)with bears and rabbits, and let your child act it out.Example:You can help organize the game, and participate as one of the "students," but let your child steer the flow of the classroom. You may discover school fears, such as mean kids or a teasing teacher. If, as his "student," you can play lightly at being scared of the kids or the teacher, your child will find this very funny, and his laughter will help release some of his scary feelings so that he can be more confident. Talk about what's going on, ask your child questions, and use the information for talks with school staff. 此帖由 annete 在 2005-07-17 02:33 进行编辑...
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4#
发表于 2005-7-18 11:46:03 | 只看该作者
感谢楼主,我基本照着这样的方法做。
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5#
发表于 2005-7-18 14:48:25 | 只看该作者
好建议!
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6#
发表于 2005-7-18 17:23:52 | 只看该作者
很有用, 值得推广
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7#
发表于 2005-7-18 17:24:52 | 只看该作者
[ <table height="100%" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" width="100%" border="0"><tr><td valign="top">正需要啊,非常感谢 </td></tr></table>
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8#
发表于 2005-7-18 18:05:52 | 只看该作者
感谢,非常有用的!
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9#
发表于 2005-7-19 18:17:44 | 只看该作者
很好的建议,值得借鉴。
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10#
发表于 2005-7-20 13:35:53 | 只看该作者
很好!我很喜欢。谢谢!
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