桃李春风一卷书，学堂家园两盏灯——择校不是选项

jiangying

极右不来论坛,来的都是左派

qqyou

原帖由 zyfh 于 2009-5-15 05:06 发表
有办法的，择校不如选老师。 ...

这个比择校还要难吧！

况且一个孩子还会有很多个老师，这怎么去择呀！

实际上学校没那么特别重要，但有条件的，肯定愿意去选择自己最想去的。

实际上除了“择”以外，更重要的是教会自己的孩子适应。

jiangying

我最近想择老师.想选个数学老师当班主任的班,可是打听不到老师的配置呢,确实很难.

all4kids

回僵硬：
我是已经死了心连校都不择了，遑论师者？

实在不行，到压力太大时再转学好了。何况我非飞飞，焉知飞飞之乐？看他现在这么享受写字、计算的乐趣，以后的学校生活也未必就给他太大压力呢。

看你不择校，却要择师，忍不住笑了一笑。

jiangying

偶然看到一个该校数学班主任的博客才动了这个念头。
不行就算了，马上报名了，这个老师教不教一年级都不知道

子不曰

前面几位提到择校不如择师，端是高论。

在这个帖子里，某不止一次提及现代教育的弊病。很早以前，读福柯的书，他直陈学校这个现代的规训机构，其实和监狱没有分别。看了这个，那叫一个震撼。后现代解构了无数现代人沉迷的泡沫，聚讼纷纭。且把他放一边去。然则，从现代大生产体系来看，被教育者在学校里的那个过程和任何一个工厂里的原材料区别其实不大。

试问，学校机构中的老师，还能有多少自己的意志，能有多少个性张扬？不过就是一个工艺环节、一个操作手法不同罢了。即便有那些很对你胃口的老师，你选得了吗？择师当然比择校难，这种事你差不多掌控了学校的大权，不难才怪！

在这种语境下，老师带徒弟的那种好老师，早就灰飞烟灭。而我们对于良师益友的想象，在当下这种情势中，难也哉！某以为，好老师的典范在西方就是苏格拉底，在东方就是孔丘。而这样老师一旦面临分数攻势、升学战役，一样得死翘翘。

有朋友和某议论，说师资是一代不如一代，一级不如一级。意思是，越往后老师越差，不仅是师德缺缺，而且水平不敢恭维；越往下水平越不好，有能力的谁愿意当小学老师啊？即便留在高校里的，在优秀学生中也是少之又少。朋友的看法，是站在现实层面看的，往后就不知道了。中小学教师中冒出叶圣陶、华罗庚这样的人，绝后恐怕大家没几个人会否认。而中小学老师来源则更是铁的现实。更让人感到可怕的是，传统的师道沦丧，而新型的教师伦理未及建立。当然，这也有社会的因素。大环境如此，你一定要求老师如何敬业，也太苛刻了。

如此，你可以左右的就是你自己、你的家庭、你的孩子已经那个小的氛围和圈子，在一个活的现实中，去发现你的良师益友，去拓展你校园的边界。眼界放开放远，也许，孩子们成长的道路不至于那么逼仄、那么残酷、那么阴暗。这种美好会在他们的发现中，在他们一次次体验中。某不觉得这个事情，有多么的艰难，多么不可行。因为生活原本就该如此。

子不曰

阮一峰


1.

上个星期，在网志中，王建硕写了一件令他烦恼的事。

他的儿子王逸凡今年3岁，已经到了必须考虑上学问题的时候了。（你也许会问，为什么3岁的孩子就要考虑上学，请读下去。）



（图片说明：王建硕和他3岁的儿子王逸凡。）

2.

王建硕说，他有三个艰难的选择。

1） 住处附近的公立小学

按照教育局的规定，学生可以就近入学。但是，他家附近的小学都刚成立不久，教育质量不高。

2） 最好的公立小学

据说，长宁区的江苏路第五小学是上海最好的小学之一。但是，想要进这样的学校，必须户口落在周围地区，而且要满一定期限。那里是上海房价最高的地区之一，一套100平米左右的普通公寓，市价接近400万人民币。

（我在Google中搜索“江苏路五小”，前40条返回结果中，有34条与房产有关。）

3） 国际学校

上海有很多国际学校，条件很好，教育理念完全与欧美接轨，孩子会学得很轻松快乐。缺点是一旦读过这样的学校，就很难再回到中国的主流教育体系了。这意味着，孩子无法在高考中与他人竞争了。

在王建硕看来，选择小学，就差不多等于为孩子选择将来。一方面，中国的教育制度对学生压力太大，一切以升学为目标，不利于孩子全面成长，他不愿意这样。另一方面，如果选择国际学校，就等于让孩子放弃了中国文化的根，他也无法接受这一点。

所以，考虑到这个决定带来的后果，他感到非常烦恼，拿不定主意。

3.

这篇网志引来了很多有趣的留言。

读者A留言：

如果河南省的一所普通学校，可以将王建硕培养成精英。那么，为什么上海浦东新区的一所普通小学，不能将他的儿子培养成才呢？

（注：在1995年的高考中，王建硕是河南省理科的全省第一名。）

读者B表示不同意：

你确实可以做到，从河南省的普通学校中晋身为成功人士，但那是1000分之一的机会。对那里的学生来说，成功是小概率事件。

但是，如果你在一所一流学校中就读，情况就不一样了。对那里的学生来说，失败是小概率事件。

因此，为了保证孩子的成功，家长的最佳策略，总是尽可能为孩子选择最好的学校。

王建硕本人说得更直接：

一想到那些年的付出和压力，以及那种淘汰制度的残酷和偶然性，我倾向于让我的孩子退出这种竞争。

15年前，我能在这种残酷的竞争中生存下来，不代表我的孩子也能生存下来。

4.

还有一些读者，则看到了一些不一样的东西。

读者C说：

如果中国的教育制度如此严格，为什么那么多毕业生找不到工作呢？

雇主们总在抱怨，大学毕业生能力不足。既然学生学得那么刻苦，为什么还会有能力不足的问题呢？

读者D说：

中国的学校教学生如何服从，外国的学校教学生如何思考。

读者E说：

不要期望这个制度会发生变化。

奥巴马说：Change（改变）！

胡总书记说：不折腾！

5.

谈谈我对这个问题的看法。

我也不知道哪一种选择更好。不管王建硕最后选择什么学校，我都能理解。

我的态度其实是无所谓，觉得顺其自然最好。理由很简单，精心设计并不能成就人的一生。你为孩子设计好人生道路，结果往往会不如你的预期，他也未必会快乐。既然不同的学校都能提供基本的教育，都能让孩子成长起来，那就找一所最方便的学校就行了。

这样说，也许有点像不可知论。我的意思是，既然不同的选择都有各自的优缺点，你又无法对结果施加很大的影响，那就不要多想了，多想也没用。

这就像丹麦哲学家克尔恺郭尔在《非此即彼》一书中写的一段话：

如果你结婚，你就会后悔；如果你不结婚，你也会后悔；无论你结婚还是不结婚，你都会后悔。嘲笑世人愚蠢，你会后悔；为之哭泣，你也会后悔；无论嘲笑还是痛哭，你都会后悔。信任一个女人，你会后悔；不信任她，你也会后悔。吊死自己，你会后悔；不吊死自己，你也会后悔。先生们，这就是一切哲学的总和和实质。

所以，不要为这种事情烦恼，让它自然发生就行了。

6.

当然，有一点我非常同意，那就是中国的教育制度不利于学生的全面发展，尤其是人格发展。对于这个，就不能无所谓了。

王建硕最后说：

I am struggling to make this country better, and at the same time, I am optimistic about China's future.

我努力让这个国家变得更美好，同时对中国的未来感到乐观。

我也是这个态度。所以，让我们不要苦苦思考应该让孩子接受还是放弃中国的教育制度，而是多想想怎样才能多做一点改革现行教育制度、促进社会进步的事情。前者就算成功，也只能帮到一个人，而后者可以帮到包括你的孩子在内的所有人。

（完）

子不曰

Which primary school should I send Yifan to? Every parent wants their child to receive the best education, and there is not standard of what best education is. Here are some choices we have:
1. To enter the public school.
There are always a public primary school in your community. However, most of the time, it is either new, or just so-so. Be definition, the most common schools are not best school.
In our case, the Chang Yi Primary school is the school Yifan can enter, but we don't feel that we like the school. There are many other great schools out there.
2. Best Public School
There are some schools like No. 5 Primary School at Jiang Su Road at Chang Ning District, or Yuan Yuan Road Primary School - they are top schools of Shanghai. However, you need to buy an apartment in that school district three years before the child enters the school. That is very similar to the school district concept in US. I checked around, and the price for that area has raised to 4 million RMB for a two bed room apartment - way too expensive.
3. International Private Schools
There are many other great schools in Biyun International District or other places in China. They accept students from all over the city, as long as you want to pay the high tuition, and their education system is aligned to international standard. Well. International standard in primary school is a negative word. Although kids are more happy and can learn in a more open environment, and have more time to pursue what they are interested, it also means the kid is kicked off from the mainstream education system in China.
Look at the public schools. They push kids to the limit to learn unlimited stuff - primary school students have to work as hard as to 9 PM to finish their homework, and their weekends are also occupied. This does not happen in international schools.
What is the choice? There are not many months for us to decide - if our choice is a very good public school, we need to act now to secure an apartment (and sell the current one at the same time). Both need time.

子不曰

In the previous article about Yifan, I talked about the choices I am trying to make for Yifan's education. As some of my readers pointed out, this is a pretty private decision. I post it here, just to help my readers to understand the challenges, and the environment I am living in - not just from the point of view of a tourist, but also from the local residents.
Education Resources are Limited
As I mentioned many times in this blog, although the GDP of this country grows very fast, the public resources like education, and health care is still far behind the demand.
To put things into perspective about why and how I am worried about education of my son, let me first describe the environment. The bottom line is, you should not use the standard of education resources of most developed countries as a basis to make decision for China.
My Story in Henan
Let's talk about the university education and my story first. Back to the year of 1995, when I entered the Gaokao (The entrance exam for colleges), there are more than half million people as myself stepped into the exam rooms with me in Henan province. Think about half million people as smart as you are, and as anxious about the future as you are, and as hard working (or more hard working) than you are.
The result? There are very limited opportunity to win in that game. There are not many good university for the students. Shanghai Jiao Tong University, for example, offers 55 positions, and Tsinghua, at that time, offers less than 50, I remember. Considering the good universities you will be happy to enter, that is 500 slots there at most.
That means, if you are not the top 500 students out of the 500K students, you are over.
There are many other colleges that you can go, but everything considered, the majority of the students entering the exam rooms will be disappointed and get back to their home with no university to go to, and they have to throw themselves to the low end labor market - construction workers, or low end sales people, or farmer, maybe...
Today, I checked the web. Congratulations. The total number of students competing for a permit to enter university in Henan province raised from 500K to 950K, and universities get more students. SJTU, as an example, raised their quota from 55 to 84. In short, competition gets tougher, than before.
The Best or the Fittest
"The fittest survives". It is from the Darwin's law. The very sad reality is, in a tough selection process like the one I described, the best may not survive, only the fittest one survive - the fittest one to exams. That is a reality that no one can easily change.
It is just like to get a train ticket in the Spring Festival. If the rate is 6 out of 10 people can get the ticket you want, you can safely assume that the one who made reasonable effort can get a ticket, and those who don't want to wake up early to line up for a ticket will fail. However, in a competition where only 1 or 2 ticket out of 1000 people is issued, what qualification the one or two luck guys need? Smart, or hardworking is not the complete answer. Luck plays so important a role.
Back to Primary Schools
The weird thing that I just discovered after Yifan was born (I didn't pay attention to it before) is, the pressure from university went down all the way to middle school, to primary school, and even to kindergarten. If you miss step once in the chain, chances are, you are over.
I think I already tend to give up for kindergarten entrance, since it is so competitive in Shanghai. You need to prepare the kid so well ahead so they can pass the entrance exam - at the age as young as 3. I heard the story from my friend, that his son was rejected, just because his son chose cake, instead of bamboo for a panda.
Crazy!
That is the reason many of my friends already chose to immigrate to other countries to get out of this. Think about the pressure and the heavy school bag, the deep degrees of glasses in very early years, I almost tend to quit this competition. I may survived in this crucial race myself 15 years ago, but what for, for the next generation?

子不曰

I will continue the topic around which school should I send Yifan to today. As I always did, I am trying to share the options I have, and the dilemma I am facing to help my readers to get some ideas about the tough decisions to make for people in this city. Again, I tried not to generalize it as a question people face in this country. For example, Shanghai and my hometown Luoyang is very different.
Primary School is Not Important, If...
Although everyone won't say primary school is not important - every stage in people's life is important, but it is not THAT important if you have to make a lot of effort to send your child to a good primary school. I believe this is the commonly accepted concept. However, the real situation in Shanghai tends to be: primary school is NOT important, if it is not tightly linked to a higher education, say, the middle school.
In a society where the resources are so scare (think about a city with 16 million people, and limited schools to choose from), the system has been twisted into a chain of selection process. Just because to enter university is so important (and hard), to get to the right high school is important. Just because most high school put so much emphasis into where the students graduate, to choose the right junior high is important. Similarly, the junior high choose by the primary school they went to. The most ridiculous thing I heard from my friend who just went through this was, the primary school put which kindergarten the kid went to as a factor of selection process.
How this happens?!
We can easily dig into details about how this happens. If you were a HR manager of a company, say Google, and there are 100 candidates seeking for the same job. By the first round of selection, will you consider their educational background and working experience before you call him/her for an interview? A Harvard or Stanford degree obviously give you some advantages.
The ridiculous thing is, everyone understand the selection process for a company, but for kids, it is completely not acceptable. Even the United Nation Human Rights Declaration passed in 1948 confirmed that all children need to be given equal opportunities for education, before they enter a selection process. That means, the selection I described is actually against the human right declaration.
The problem is even further beyond that. The current system in Shanghai actually at the surface level, follows with the spirit - students are equally allocated to the school near them, and there is no such a difference. However, the faculty resources, and budget resources are far less evenly distributed. As long as there are clearly identified good schools, or bad schools, parents mobilize to get to the better school district by buying houses.
So the key is, although it seems to be fair, as long as the schools are not created equal, and more importantly, as long as the university education is so scare a resource, the problem is very hard to fix.
The Hard Choice
Before Yifan was 1.5 years old, Wendy and I have decided to send him to the school within walking distance from where we live. However, when we realized that if you mis-step in this chain once, you may lose the opportunity for the kid in the future. It is not as easy a decision to make as we thought. Let me repeat, the choice is no longer a primary school choice, it is the education style much further than that. The chance to get to a better middle school for Yifan is much lower than the selected good primary school, based on the information I collected so far.
This is a tough decision to make.
One Kid, Two Systems
Another tough decision to make is, which path I want Yifan to go - Chinese educational system or the international one. Again, the two path is not compatible with each other.
It is very sure that a kid from international school cannot (at least it is very hard to) get back to the Chinese educational system. You are smarter than others, and you know how to sing and dance, and are extremely well developed, but you cannot pass the exam! Especially many exams are very weird if you are not educated in that system. Politics in Chinese educational system is something interesting. What you need to remember is what the propaganda that you know is far from truth.
It is also not easy for a kid from Chinese educational system to get to international system. Well. This is relatively easier than the other way, since many people (both at university, graduate school, or high school level) have proved it. I guess that a student from Chinese system will find it a paradise in an international school after the initial culture shock.
In Shanghai, there are many international schools (English school, American Schools, and schools from all nations, and some plainly called International schools with students from everywhere). It seems to me a very attractive choice. The serious fact to consider is, if you choose this path, you kid will need to say good bye to Chinese universities - it is not an option any more, since it is for sure that the graduates cannot pass the college entrance exam.
Primary School Education is the Foundation for Cultural Identity
Another even bigger question in my mind that I am trying to seek an answer is, culturely speaking, whether you want Yifan to be a Chinese, or, English speaking "foreigners".
I am not kidding. I read a lot about the culture differences (as you can imagine, a topic I have devoted myself in the last 7 years), and my conclusion is, it is the primary school which determines one's cultural identity. If the kid went to primary school in US, he is culturally an American. I said I preserved a Chinese identity myself (Why I Don't Have an English Name), and if you ask me, I would prefer the same for Yifan. I surely understand the confusion, internal struggle of a mixed-blood (culturally).
Then the question will be, although I know it makes better sense to send Yifan to an international school if I just want him to be happy, it proposes a question in the future - Yifan will feel more at home when he sees western drama, than watching Beijing Opera.
I Haven't Decided Yet
I still have about one year to consider, and I don't have an answer yet. It is not an easy decision to make.
P.S. My readers asked me in the previous article about what happens if the parents are not Shanghai resident. They can send their children to a school until middle school. They have to get back to where they original live for the exam, which is much harder than Shanghai. I am happy that even today, the policy is much better, because, as I stated in the story in this article: Hukou System in China, I never receive kindergarten education myself, since no kindergarten accepted me just because I didn't have a city Hukou. See. That is the reason on one side, I am struggling to make this country better, and at the same time, I am optimistic about China's future.