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标题: 你打算在孩子多大时对他进行爱情教育? [打印本页]

作者: 你带来的幸福    时间: 2012-2-27 17:52
标题: 你打算在孩子多大时对他进行爱情教育?
大家网上随便搜一下,就能看到这两天热炒的新闻   17岁少女因拒绝男孩子的求爱惨遭毁容

我的关注点不在于男孩子是不是官二代,这不重要

我想的是:如果不去寄望与学校,
                 我们这些家长应该在孩子多大的时候对他们进行爱情教育?
                 我们这些家长又应该用什么样的方法来帮助孩子树立健康良好的爱情观呢?

亲爱的各位,你们想过吗?
来聊聊吧
作者: mary_xing    时间: 2012-2-27 21:55
标题: 回复 #1 你带来的幸福 的帖子
还真没有想过
现在的孩子很难教啊,社会的影响太大
作者: 你带来的幸福    时间: 2012-2-27 22:03
原帖由 mary_xing 于 2012-2-27 21:55 发表
还真没有想过
现在的孩子很难教啊,社会的影响太大



看到新闻的时候就在想:如果家长或者学校(估计学校是不太会讲这个啦)给孩子适当的灌输些爱情观的东西,引导下青春期的孩子们如何对待情绪上的冲动,以及如何应对挫折,可能这种类似的事情就会少发生一些吧

但是怎么去引导呢
作者: 我爱飞飞    时间: 2012-2-27 22:08
在我儿子五六岁的时候,听我们谈到他叔叔的婚姻问题,就开始担心自己未来是不是能找到伴侣啦

不过现在他对女孩子还处于不感兴趣的状态,肯定不是谈这个话题的时候。
但有些男孩子很小就产生了对女孩子(尤其是长相好学习好的优秀女孩)的兴趣,那么就可以适当的早点教起。
像我儿子班上最受欢迎的女生,她自己也知道男生喜欢她,也会和妈妈谈到这个问题呢。

我们大人不避讳,孩子也不觉得这个话题见不得人,就是最好的啦。

至于学校,是到了五年级的时候会集中上两性伦理讲座课的
作者: 我是小乖乖    时间: 2012-2-28 10:26
看了那条新闻,心里真的很沉重.虽然孩子还小,我从来也没有想过这些问题.不过身为女儿的妈妈,还是一直都很担心不好的社会风气对女孩的不公.
我们都是从青春期走过来的,当时的反应怎么没这么大,当时也没有这么多的事情.现在社会进步了,问题变多了,变复杂了,变极端了.
看来我还真是要好好想想对孩子的多方位教育了.
作者: ozma    时间: 2012-2-28 14:19
我想,孩子到一定年龄,给他们恰当的爱情小说阅读,比家长的说教更有效。俺小时候没读过爱情小说,不知道哪些该给孩子哪些不该给
作者: 子云    时间: 2012-2-28 16:23
豆上学期喜欢他们班长,这学期又只在无聊时才找别人玩了,
作者: 你带来的幸福    时间: 2012-2-29 10:37
原帖由 ozma 于 2012-2-28 14:19 发表
我想,孩子到一定年龄,给他们恰当的爱情小说阅读,比家长的说教更有效。俺小时候没读过爱情小说,不知道哪些该给孩子哪些不该给



看爱情小说是不错的方法吧

但是哪些适合呢?以前我们看的 呼啸山庄?简爱?应该不适合吧
琼瑶?还是不要了吧,电视也演的太多

看哪些呢》
什么时候看呢
作者: 你带来的幸福    时间: 2012-2-29 10:39
原帖由 子云 于 2012-2-28 16:23 发表
豆上学期喜欢他们班长,这学期又只在无聊时才找别人玩了,


好像是这样的
小点的男孩是比较喜欢班级里学习好,经常受老师表扬的女生
大一点了似乎就会改变,
女孩子不也是吗?开始时喜欢学习好的,帅的男生,然后会喜欢帅帅的,坏坏的男生
作者: menghuan    时间: 2012-2-29 11:00
我要把我儿子培养成学习好,又帅,又有点坏的男生,哈哈。
作者: menghuan    时间: 2012-2-29 11:05
现在应该还算不上是爱情教育,但是儿子有时候跟我说他会喜欢谁谁谁的,我也不会大惊小怪。我只是对他说:“如果你要找女朋友,什么时候都可以,但是你不能因为你要给女朋友送什么东西而跟我要钱。”呵呵,很实际吧。

我跟儿子说,你要找女朋友,就要让她幸福,没有经济能力,没有钱,怎么办呢?我只会负担你的费用。

儿子之前也说过,喜欢班里一个学习比较好的女生,但现在也不喜欢了。因为他自己的成绩也很好,人又聪明,而且又长得比较帅, 所以也有几个女孩喜欢他,当然,是他自己觉得人家喜欢他。 我们也不当回事,现在又说那些对那些女孩子都没感觉了。

这是一个漫长的过程,有一些东西需要家长教,有一些需要从影视书本中学,还有一些需要孩子自己去悟,当然,也有很多是天份,随他吧,只要不走歪路就成。
作者: 你带来的幸福    时间: 2012-2-29 11:13
原帖由 menghuan 于 2012-2-29 11:05 发表
现在应该还算不上是爱情教育,但是儿子有时候跟我说他会喜欢谁谁谁的,我也不会大惊小怪。我只是对他说:“如果你要找女朋友,什么时候都可以,但是你不能因为你要给女朋友送什么东西而跟我要钱。”呵呵,很实际 ...



menghuan 你说的真好
做家长的碰到孩子说喜欢这类话的时候,不去大惊小怪,甚至严厉制止,很多时候孩子也会慢慢淡忘,转移自己的注意和兴趣
反倒是家长如果过于紧张,制止,孩子的叛逆心或者好奇心一起,事情的发展可能就不受控制了

中学更是个敏感期,家长的引导会更加重要

但是就如menghuan你所说,爱情教育真的是一个漫长的过程,孩子在这个过程中会慢慢长大,会有点磕磕绊绊,但是只要我们家长记得随时扶正孩子的陆,他们总会顺利平安走下去的
作者: ozma    时间: 2012-2-29 11:41
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作者: ozma    时间: 2012-2-29 11:49
另外,这里有些pre-teens爱情故事讨论:
http://www.ihav.net/vb/books-com ... re-teens-16360.html
作者: 我爱飞飞    时间: 2012-3-1 06:46
嗯,爱情小说是个好选择,我十几岁时可是看了不少,一天两本的速度是常态啊。

另外,在十二三岁的时候,给机会让孩子去交往也是好的。
让一切都发生在你眼前,总比背着你发生一些完全不可接受的事更好。
孩子和父母的关系好,你自然第一时间知道很多事,可以帮忙出主意甚至出力,就不至于发生什么让人后悔的事啦。
作者: 童童ma咪    时间: 2012-3-4 21:52
我家女儿现在最喜欢的一个幼儿园小朋友就是坐在她对面的小男生!
当然,幼儿园之前上早教的时候,她有一个王子,经常一起玩的小男生,暑假里俩人打电话,就说:
--王子,我快要回上海了!
--公主,我从海边带了贝壳要送给你!
外婆在旁边听了电话要笑死了。

这个爱情教育,一定要从娃娃抓起,不论年龄,如果他有这方面的问题,就和她讨论,给他建议,各家孩子经历这方面事情的年龄不一样,所以时间也不一样啦!
我们是女儿,所以更加要注意,注意培养她对人的鉴赏能力,以避免以后陷入一些不必要的情感的纠结中。
作者: aabbxx    时间: 2012-3-4 23:06
有机會就教育也是一種方法, 多多少少耳儒目染也是不錯




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